


The Golden God

by patroclusandachilles (echelonlove)



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-26
Updated: 2017-05-26
Packaged: 2018-11-05 05:39:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11007120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/echelonlove/pseuds/patroclusandachilles
Summary: Dennis is the Golden God.  Literally.  But his worshipers have all abandoned him.  Until one day, he finally feels the tug of devotion again.





	The Golden God

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Blink_Blue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blink_Blue/gifts).



> Based on Blink_Blue's prompt of "Literally anything is good" and "open to anything." 
> 
> Well, this sure is anything! I've been meaning to write something where Dennis' nickname for himself was actually literal, so I took this opportunity to write the brief Greek God AU no one asked for. Thanks for the wide open window, Blink_Blue! I hope you enjoy what I did with it!
> 
> Beta'd by my brother who loves IASIP more than anything, and I mean anything.

Dennis had been powerful once.  He was feared in every village along the Mediterranean and was worshipped more than any other gods except for the Twelve Olympians themselves.  Olympus was his palace and there wasn’t a nymph or satyr in the world who hadn’t swooned at his feet.  But as quickly as he had ascended, the Golden God was struck down. 

 

He wasn’t killed or banished or punished.  He had simply lost all of his power.  For a god to be anything, they had to be worshipped by mankind.  After centuries of never ending pleasure and strength, Dennis lost everything in the span of a year.

 

All it took to erase thousands of years of growing his strength and nurturing his cult throughout the world was human apathy.  Mankind was fickle and the Golden God had forgotten to answer their prayers while he partook in the rewards their worship provided.  There was nothing worse to ardent worshippers than an absent god, and they had fled his temples in droves.   

 

In his absence, Apollo, whom he deemed the worst of all the gods by far, spread his own worship as the golden god of light to every old temple and altar dedicated to the real Golden God.  Those who had once worshipped him turned to a god who provided for them. 

 

He was furious but there was nothing he could do.  Without worship, his power waned, and the Pantheon Council threw him off of Mount Olympus.  He would not die if he was forgotten.  No, he would live on and on and on without power or pleasure or company.  All he could do was roam the earth endlessly as did all the other forgotten gods.  Those he had mocked and laughed at before hardly spared him a glance as their paths crossed now. 

 

Dennis was tired.  There was nothing of interest for him on this planet.  Not a single person was worth anything to him, and he was tired of mankind.  All they had to give him were abandoned temples.  He would give anything to be worshipped properly again, with love and fear and awe. 

 

The Golden God was forgotten and completely alone.

 

That is, he had been alone. 

 

As he was wandering through Athens, Dennis felt a tug at his center.  It was small and barely noticeable, but he had felt it.  He looked about wildly, trying to find the origin of the feeling.  As he walked out of the city and to the west, the tug acted as a beacon, guiding him to a worshipper.  He had a worshipper again!  He would have cried in joy, but he didn’t wish to smudge the kohl he lined around his eyes every morning. 

 

After walking for miles, he finally came across a small farm.  The house looked to be no larger than a single room and its roof was missing patches in several places.  One old bull who looked to be badly malnourished and of no use to anyone slept near the crumbling structure. The field surrounding the modest farmhouse was brown and barren as far as the mortal eye could see. 

 

_Wonderful_ , Dennis thought.  _My first worshipper in one hundred years and he’s some dirty old farmer in the middle of nowhere._   He felt the tug in his chest again, and this time he could tell it was coming from the other side of the house.  _The old man must have some ancient altar passed down through his family_.  The Golden God rolled his eyes.  The man must have been desperate for godly help and was praying to anyone who would listen.  Begrudgingly, Dennis began to make his way around the house.  He wasn’t in any position to refuse a worshipper.  One person to look upon him in awe was one more than he had ever hoped to have again.  

 

Grumbling under his breath, Dennis rounded the house and immediately stopped in his tracks.  Kneeling before an ancient altar was a young attractive man.  His dark brown hair was soft and falling in his eyes as he bent over the altar.  _Now this is something I can work with_.  Dennis smirked, and he walked behind the altar before booming in his most impressive tone, “Lucky supplicant!  Rise and behold the beauty of your Golden God.” 

 

The man fell backwards, and it took a minute before he composed himself again.  “Holy shit!  Holy shit, holy shit!  Hey, I’m Mac!  Who are you?”

 

“What do you mean who am I?  You summoned me with your prayers.”

 

Mac started laughing.  “Oh my god, bro!  You’re Dennis, the old Golden God, aren’t you?” he managed to say between laughs.  “I can’t believe this old piece of crap actually summoned some defunct asshole.”

 

Dennis’ vision went red.  “What the fuck are you talking about?”  He seethed and clenched his fists.

 

“Dude!  So, I found this broken piece of shit altar right, and I thought, hmm, what if I could trick this jabroni into actually appearing?  And you did!”  Mac was done laughing and was now looking at Dennis with a little less mirth and a little more wonder.  “Bro!  Does this mean you have to give me three wishes now?”

 

Dennis scoffed and crossed his arms.  “Three wishes?  Where are we, Mesopotamia?  No, no, you’ll be lucky if the worst you get from me is death, filthy ingrate!”  He was shaking.  “I will pop out your eyeballs and shove them so far down your throat you’ll see your innards.  I will tear off your ears and toss them into the river Styx where you will hear the screaming of a billion souls for all eternity.  I will rip off your nose and bury it in a pile of that bull’s shit.  Don’t test me, asshole.  You bastard!”

 

Mac rocked backwards on his feet a bit, looking shocked.  The shock didn’t last long.  “Woah!  That was badass!  There was some awesome light pouring out of your eyes and I swear the ground started to shake a little.  Do it again!”

 

Dennis was dumbfounded over not getting the right reaction.  Mac should be cowering in terror, he should be begging for forgiveness with his face buried in the dirt, he should be worshipping the Golden God’s almighty power.  But all he did was look at Dennis with excitement. 

 

Dennis looked back at Mac with the same excitement in his soul.  He had forgotten what it felt like to be worshipped.  Granted, that hadn’t been Mac’s initial intention, but he certainly was worshipping him now.  “Was there anything you wanted?  Or did you just call me down here for a laugh?”

 

Mac was staring at him and smiling sweetly.  “You’re really pretty.  Do you put on all that eye gunk by yourself?”

 

“What?”  Dennis asked, confused.  “Is there anything you need or not, because if not, then I’m going to leave.”  After he said it, Dennis realized he actually didn’t want to leave just yet.  Not only was someone finally staring at him in awe and wonder again, but he was beginning to admire Mac’s stupid bravery for speaking his mind to a god without thinking about the horrible consequences.  Dennis smiled invitingly, hoping to entice Mac to request a favor from him.  Something he could grant Mac that would earn his devotion forever.

 

Mac smiled back and didn’t say anything.  They both stood there and stared.  Finally, Mac blinked and shook his head slightly to break himself of the daze he had been under.  “I don’t really need anything, I guess.  But hey, did you want to come meet my friends?  Charlie was exposed as a baby but survived, so he’s not entirely all there, but he’s so much fun!  Dude, you have never seen someone bash rats like he can!  And Frank is old and grumpy, but he has all this money, right?  And he always goes along with whatever Charlie is doing.  And Dee is a bit of bitch and she looks like a bird, but when she gets angry, she’s so funny.  She shouts and her face gets all red.  It’s hilarious!”

 

Dennis blinked slowly.  “Are you inviting a god to lower himself by associating with you and your loser friends?  A god who told you he could violently murder you and torture you for all of eternity?”  Dennis was growing more and more intrigued by Mac. 

 

Mac laughed again, and it was bright and beautiful.  “Yeah!  You’d totally fit right in!  You and Dee can have shouting matches!” 

 

Dennis thought for a moment before asking, “And they’ll worship me?”

 

“Of course they will, how could they not?”

 

Dennis smiled to himself and thought of new worshippers and new friends.  And he thought of Mac.  He had known the guy for a grand total of ten baffling minutes, but there was something about him that Dennis was drawn to.  There was a spark of fearlessness in Mac.  While Dennis’ worshippers had admired him, all of them had done so through a heavy layer of fear.  No one had ever just looked at him in awe like Mac was doing.  It tightened his chest and made the godlike power lying dormant within him stir warmly. 

 

And honestly, what did he have to lose?  He could keep wandering the earth alone for all of eternity, or he could see what else Mac could shake loose within him.  “All right, I’ll hang out with you for a little bit.”  He stepped forward and clapped Mac on the shoulder.  “It’s not like I have anything better to do.” 

 

Mac jumped a little and began moving his arms in a strange chopping motion which was accompanied by a shouted “Awesome!” 

 

Mac extended his hand and Dennis took it, and he was led away from the old altar.  With every step, his chest lightened.  Weight he hadn’t realized he had been carrying through centuries of being feared melted off with each smile Mac directed at him over his shoulder.  _So this is what it feels like to be loved,_ he thought, smiling back at Mac.  _I could get used to this._

 

Mac stopped abruptly and Dennis ran into his back.  “Don’t take this the wrong way or anything, but you’re totally staring at me really funny right now.  And it’s really hot and wow, did I tell you how pretty you are yet?”  He squeezed Dennis’ hand.

 

Dennis smiled in the most charming way he could muster.  The feeling of being loved was like being surrounded in soothing golden light.  “So I started out a dud god and now I’m the hottest, huh?” 

 

“Sorry bro.”  Mac actually looked a little sheepish.  “I mean, you saw that altar.  What was I supposed to think?  That people had forgotten a god like you?  There’s no way that’s even possible.”

 

Dennis moved closer to Mac, feeling the warmth of Mac’s love and devotion spread out of his chest and into his stomach.  He cupped Mac’s face and his fingers tingled with his growing power.  “You’ll never forget me, will you Mac?”

 

“No,” Mac breathed out in a whisper. 

 

“You’ll never abandon me.  You’ll never stop worshipping me.  You’ll always love me, won’t you Mac?” 

 

Mac’s gaze was locked on Dennis’ own now.  Dennis could see the shift in his eyes.  Where they had been mocking and light after Mac summoned him, they were now dark and hypnotized.  Dennis’ awe and power had won over Mac in record time.  “I didn’t even know you existed before today.  But now I’ll always love you, Dennis.” 

 

“Good.”  Dennis stroked a thumb over Mac’s bottom lip.  “And I will always love my most treasured worshipper.”  He leaned in and brought their mouths together, sealing Mac’s worship forever.  At the gentle touch, Dennis’ power exploded through his body stronger than it ever had.  Love was an addicting side of worship.  And worship Mac did, deepening the kiss and deepening his devotion.

 

Dennis’ head was buzzing with light, and the Golden God could not have been happier.  He didn’t have to be alone anymore.  As long as Mac was alive, his love would power Dennis stronger than millions of fearful devotees ever had. 

 

Mac pulled away and smiled before turning back to the road.  Three people were walking down it toward them.  “It’s the gang, come and meet them!”

 

Dennis happily followed Mac, no longer a disgraced and forgotten outcast.  He was powerful again.  He was finally back to being the Golden God.


End file.
